Online love is often blind, brief: study
Posted on Thu, 22 May 2008 09:29:52 CDT | by Luigi Lugmayr
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By James Grubel
CANBERRA (Reuters) - Matches made over the Internet often do not last because
people end up choosing unsuitable partners and forming emotional bonds before
meeting face-to-face, an Australian university researcher has found.
Women were especially susceptible to finding Mr. Wrong, as they tend to be
attracted by witty comments or clever emails, said psychologist Matthew Bambling
from the Queensland University of Technology.
"You can never assume things are the way they seem online," Bambling told
Reuters on Thursday.
"Just because they can write a clever comment or a witty email, doesn't mean
they will be Mr. Right, that's for sure," he said, adding some men use the
concept of "netting," sending emails to dozens of women and hoping one might
respond.
Bambling said you can find a partner online, but warned those using the Web to
find love to be aware of the pitfalls.
"There's definitely a dis-inhibition affect online," he said, with people more
likely to exaggerate their good points while hiding anything negative.
"Few guys for example would say 'look, I'm a middle aged alcoholic who's been
married five times, pick me'. They're going to present themselves as a good
catch."
He said it was easy for people to quickly invest too much emotionally in an
online relationship because they don't see the full picture of the person they
are emailing.
He said some people can also become addicted to the rush of replies they receive
on dating websites, which can lead to future disappointment.
Bambling said people can avoid many of the problems by meeting early in the
virtual relationship, rather than by getting to know each other only by email.
He suggests couples arrange to meet over coffee after a few emails, which will
help people from building up a fantasy image of their match.
"The main thing to remember is to make real life contact as soon as possible if
you are to interested in someone, because then you will know if a relationship
is a possibility," he said.
(Editing by Miral Fahmy)
© Copyright 2007 Reuters.
Posted on Thu, 22 May 2008 09:29:52 CDT | by Luigi Lugmayr
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