I have been having problems lately with my neighbor pulling up at 2:30 in the morning with his stupid car stereo booming and waking up my kids. So I am having fantasies of painful ways to make the point to him that this is unacceptable behavior on his part.

While poking around at my new favorite store for geeky toys, Hobbytron, I came across what may be the ideal way to make my point, the Airsoft Accushot Competition Master Sniper Rifle. This massive Airsoft gun weighs in at 6 pounds and only the trigger guard and stock are made of plastic, everything else is metal. The coolest part is that it can shoot .20g BB’s at 315-325 fps or .12g BB’s at 450 fps with a nearly dead silent precision. Equipped with a scope the Airsoft rifle could give the up close view I need to shoot the wanker in the testicles as he climbs out of his car. My hope is that after a few nights of sniping his balls will hurt every time he turns the radio up, quite Pavlovian.